With the new Star Wars 3D dropping this week it would be dope if Sam Jackson could overdub all of Jar Jar Binks dialogue. Just a wish.

–Over the weekend, 86-year-old Serafino Alfe of Mount Prospect, Illinois was deep frying turkeys for an event at his local country club.  As he approached the fryer, he tripped on a piece of cardboard.

–He knocked into the fryer, and spilled seven-and-a-half gallons of SCALDING OIL on his leg.  So instead of successfully deep frying a turkey, he deep fried his own leg.

–He ended up with third-degree burns and needed a skin graft.

–He’s recovering in the hospital now, but at least he has a sense of humor about the whole thing.  He says he loves deep fried turkey, but he doesn’t want to taste his own, quote, “drumstick.”

(Chicago Sun Times)

When the image of*Jesus appears on a Wal-Mart receipt or the Virgin Mary shows up on a slice of toast, the secular world howls with derision at the faithful who line up to witness these Rorschach “miracles.”

But when the scrotal ultrasound of a 45-year-old patient with severe testicular pain and a possible mass revealed the surprising image of a man in distress, urologists at Queen’s University, in Ontario, followed proper scholarly procedure: They submitted it to Urology, the official journal of the International Society of Urology.

“The residents and staff alike were amazed to see the outline of a man’s face staring up out of the image, his mouth agape as if the face seen on the ultrasound scan itself was also experiencing severe epididymo-orchitis,” wrote the authors, G. Gregory Roberts and Naji J. Touma, in an article that appeared in the journal’s September issue. “A brief debate ensued on whether the image could have been a sign from a deity (perhaps ‘Min,’ the Egyptian god of male virility); however, the consensus deemed it a mere coincidental occurrence rather than a divine proclamation.”

The patient underwent an orchiectomy, or testicular removal, and the mass proved benign, but evidently not divine.

http://chronicle.com/blogs/tweed/the…&utm_medium=en

So I left for a flight this morning and I was all packed up and ready to go. It was a short stay in Belize so I just packed my bookbag. I arrive to the airport at 9:18 for a flight that left at 10:15. Delta didn’t let me on. I missed my flight (the only one leaving today) and will have to wait til at least September to peep Belize. It’s on for life between me and Delta. Pissed off I came home and recorded this.

Skittles – Newlyweds – Dir. Cousins [Not affiliated with Wrigley or Skittles. Contains explicit content not suitable for minors] from Cousins on Vimeo.

Since the passing of  “MACHO MAN” RANDY SAVAGE THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR has really been in Wrestlemania 7 #beastmode

– Warrior has been threatening to post a video exposing his longtime enemy HULK HOGAN as a two-faced scumbag.

–Yesterday, he unleashed a seven-minute preview of that video . . . which he promises will be a full 55 minutes long.  And the preview alone is pretty hardcore.

–He starts off by refuting Hogan’s claim that he had made his peace with Savage before his death.  He says, quote, “Let’s get real, man, you didn’t reconnect with Randy.

–”I mean, you’re a real piece of [crap].  You just recently reconnected with a friend you hadn’t spoken to in 10 years?  Ten years there was silence between you and Randy.”

–He also blames Hulk and his then-wife LINDA for the breakup of Randy’s marriage to MISS ELIZABETH.  (–Hogan’s real name is TERRY BOLLEA, by the way.  And you’ll hear Warrior call him “Terry” numerous times.)

–Then he really lets loose . . . calling Hulk a COKE HEAD.  He says, quote, “There are days, Terry, where you do nothing but sit around and snort cocaine.  Terry, you truly are a dope head.  You have been into getting high and doing dope for years.”

–He also accuses Hogan of turning other people into junkies just to keep them in line . . . quote, “You were so fearful of confrontation that you assisted other guys in keeping them junkies just so you could have control over them.”

–It gets even worse.  Warrior accuses Hulk and Linda of having had an OPEN MARRIAGE.  He says, quote, “You were both whores that did slutty stuff on the side.  Neither one of you had a problem with the other one getting thrills on the side.

–”In fact, Terry, you tried to get ME to sample those thrills.  You know, being the only wrestler that said ‘no’ to so many things in wrestling, I bet I’m the only guy that ever said no to doing your wife.”

–Hulk Hogan has heard what the Warrior has to say.  And he plans to answer . . . IN COURT.  He’s already alerted his attorney . . . and a lawsuit may be imminent.

–As far as Warrior’s allegations, Hulk says, quote, “None of that ever happened.  This guy is out of his mind.”

This is f-in awesome